IVF, Work, and Finding Support Where You Least Expect It

In my last post, I had just gone through my second embryo transfer. This time, I approached things differently. During my first transfer, I was full of excitement — my mum came into the room, and there was such a buzz in the air. After that first disappointment, though, I wanted to hold back a little and see how things unfolded.

When I read and listen to stories from other women going through the IVF process, I’m mindful that I’m still early in my experience. Many have gone through multiple transfers before finding success. I hope I won’t have to repeat the process too many times, but I’m also realistic — there’s no guarantee with IVF.

Looking back at my journal entries from that second two-week wait, my emotions were all over the place. I’d written that I hadn’t felt like journaling much and needed time to pause and reflect. A few days before I was due to find out the results, I made one short note:

“When a transfer doesn’t work, you feel deflated. I didn’t really cry the first time — I just pushed through. Now, waiting again, I feel anxious and stressed. Strangely, I’m worried both that it won’t work… and that it will.”

Thinking about the possibility of having a child made me reflect on my own life — my childhood, my teenage years, and the lessons I’ve learned along the way. I thought about how I’d want to raise a child: how I’d want to protect them but also give them the freedom to grow into who they are. Those thoughts gave me nervous butterflies and stirred all kinds of emotions.

Before I move on to the outcome of that transfer, I want to touch on something I hadn’t written about before in my previous posts — navigating IVF and work. Talking about fertility or pregnancy with your employer can feel daunting. When I first began IVF, I had just moved interstate and started a new job.

About six months into the new role, I started wondering about timing. Should I pause the IVF process for twelve months and wait until I was more settled? I remember thinking, I can’t just start a new job and then announce I’m pregnant within the first year.

Shortly after having those thoughts, I decided to be upfront. In one of my one-on-one chats, I told my manager that I was pursuing IVF. Her reaction was incredible — she shared that her best friend had also conceived through IVF as a single woman and told me to take any time I needed for appointments. That conversation made me feel supported and understood, and I’ll always be grateful for that kindness.

I know not everyone has the chance to have that kind of supportive conversation at work, and that shouldn’t come down to chance. Every woman deserves understanding and respect when it comes to fertility and motherhood. Having genuine workplace support around pregnancy — whether through IVF or not — makes such a difference.

Anyway, back to where I began — the outcome of that second embryo transfer. The two-week wait had felt long, and now it was finally time to find out the result. During my first transfer, I’d taken the day off to wait at home for the call. This time, I was at work, trying to keep busy and manage my expectations. When the clinic’s number appeared on my phone, I stepped outside to take the call, unsure if I was ready to hear the news.

The nurse confirmed what I’d been hoping for — I was pregnant. I didn’t quite believe it at first and asked if she was sure, if there was any chance of error. She reassured me there wasn’t. Hearing those words made it real. A rush of emotion followed — disbelief, joy, relief, and excitement all at once. The first person I wanted to call was my mum, but I couldn’t reach her. So, funnily enough, the first person I told was that same manager who had supported me along the way.

That moment reminded me how much kindness can matter — whether from family, friends, or the people we work with. 💕

For me, this isn’t just about IVF or work. It’s about finding understanding in unexpected places and realising that compassion can make even the hardest experiences a little lighter.

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💕 Thank you for reading — and for being part of this space where IVF stories are shared honestly.